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Change is inevitable.  We all know it and yet most of us fear change.  We fear walking into the unknown, the un-discovered and it is because we do not know if we will be safe or not.  It all comes down to safety.  We are so afraid of change that we would rather stay with the uncomfortable, the un-fulfilling, the un-satisfying than face change.  I know people that stay in horribly abusive situation because they are afraid that what ever situation that follows will be worse than the one they are in.  They become numb.  This, to some degree or another, is how most people live their lives.  Sad, I know, but fact.  We would rather become numb to our existence  than change it.

Even when we have someone telling us that we can have a better life if we only…Give up the job, leave the partner or move.  We are so accustomed to our existence and numbness that we can not see beyond our current reality.  So we are in fear about what might come next.  The reason this happens is that it touches us in our very survival and when that happens we go into our fight or flight mechenism and we hunker down.  We will fight anyone or anything that threatens our reality.  We may not want to consciously stay in the bad marriage, partnership, job, town, whatever it is but at least we know what to expect.

So what happens when we finally get beyond the fear and do decide to make the change?  We have mustered up our courage and we take that leap of faith and……. there we are.  Things are always more interesting, scary, exhilarating.  This is the point where we find out what we are made of.  Many people get to this point, they have finally taken a step in the right direction and suddenly something comes along that triggers their fear and they jump back into the old pattern.  Or,. something comes along and they feel fear but they still decide to continue on the new path.  These are the few that dare to live grander, bigger and more adventurous lives.  They have faced themselves and their fear and still, they moved forward.

Does this mean that they will never face fear again, No!  They will probably face fear every day; it is just the way of things.  What will be different is that they know that they will survive.   This is the journey of life, we either grow and learn to face fear and change or we stand still.  I for one choose to face my fears head on every day because that means that I am growing and really, what’s the point of living if we are not growing?  I figure why waste the trip!

Learn to embrace change and take advantage of every opportunity to face yourself in truth.  Move forward knowing that you have lived, really lived!

I invite you to change something everyday, you might just like it!

If you would like to move forward in your life and  embrace change or would like to develop tools and skills to do that…I teach courses, classes and workshops to support you in you journey.  Go to http://www.in-lighten.net

In Light, Lorayne

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Today on the radio show, 1150AM, KKNW 8-9AM 1st Monday of the month, I took callers for the first on the show.  It was wonderful to hear from viewers who really want to embrace their independence of the outside influences in their lives.

I understand that it is not easy to shut the outside out, it is constantly in our faces screaming for our attention, it takes diligence to keep yourself on your track and not on everyone else’s.

What works for me is to;

Shut off the news or even TV all together.

Read books take inspire and uplift you.

If you have friends that are constantly trying to bring you down, maybe it is time to find new friends!

Let family members that do not believe your way have their thoughts and you keep yours.

Let family members know that you are no listening to the news or the doom and gloom and ask them to keep any negativity to themselves

Make choices that support you and uplift you. In every moment.

Be willing to make changes that are uncomfortable but in  the long run are beneficial.

Start with this moment right NOW.  Make a choice.

You are probably saying “easy for you”  but I too had to stat somewhere, I have just been doing this longer.  This is not easy work but it is the most important work you will ever do on your own behalf.  How important do you think you are in your life, if not you then who?  If you do not put you first in your life no one else will!  Take a stand, make a choice, live in passion for YOU!  You are worth the effort and your life is worth the effort, be willing to live a life of magic.

Be the role model for your children, your community, your country and the world.  The more of usthat are willing to shift our perspectives and live lives of our own choosing, the more we gicve others permission to do the same.

Take the challenge and live your Truth!

Experiment and have fun.


This month I have been talking about Joy, how Joy shows up in your life.  How are you using Joy to move you out of pain, frustration and sadness? Let’s look at ways you have shared with me the simple ways you have played with JOY.

Rena in Bothell, WA  “I have been struggling with changes in my family.  My father was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer and I have been finding it difficult to feel happy or joy, all I feel is sad. This news is not what we expected.  My mother is having a particularly difficult time.  I heard you on the radio talking about joy and decided to give it a try.  I wanted to feel joy bubbling up inside of me, it took me a while, I really wanted to feel better and change how I was looking at the situation.  After a minute or two of focusing on times in my family when we were all together and happy, I really did feel better.  I am going to get my family talking about the good times and see if that does not help.  Thank you.”

Rena, I know what you are going through, my mother was recently diagnosed with uterine cancer and when I heard the news I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach.
I recently sat with my mother during her recovery from surgery and looked through old photographs of times when both my mother and I were children it was really fun to take that walk down memory lane.  I know that I always say live in the now, but sometimes it is valuable to remember those really happy times so that you can remember the feelings. Taking that walk down memory lane was a very special time and one that I know lifted our spirits.

Karen in Seattle “I was recently laid off from work and this is a scary time.  I have three children and all of us have become accustomed to living on two incomes.  It is really hard to feel joy when everything around me says it is all falling apart.”

Karen, I hear what you are saying and I tell you, this is the most important time to feel joy!  Have you ever heard the statement “What you focus on you get?”  Well it is true, I know many of us have had times when we are really sad or upset or scared, everything around us seems to be falling apart and then it just keeps on snowballing.  So, how do you feel joy in the midst of chaos?  Change your focus, look at what you do have, a healthy family, a loving husband, beautiful things to surround you, friends.  The trick is to focus on what you are grateful for, the more you focus on gratitude the more you will move out of fear and into joy!

Sometimes we are given challenges in life to help us focus on what is really important, the simple joys of being with those you love and sharing a smile, a cup of tea and remembering the love.

The joys in life are most often those simple little unexpected moments when you can let the worries of the day wash off of you and be present in your life.

Let us all allow space for more joy in our lives!


Many of us focus on the end results of our life and not on what is happening right now in this moment,  I wondered what it was that kept us focusing on the future with little or no thought or focus on today.  Really, you do not know what the future holds for you and even if you did you would have no control over it anyway.  The only thing you have control over is you in this moment, so why waste the opportunity?  Being a control freak myself, I like to have control or at least the illusion of control, so if I know that right now in this moment I can truly have control over my life, then I say let me at it!  I have control over what I think, what I say, how I feel and what I do about it, What Power, I am giddy with it.  Right now in this moment I choose to live my life to the fullest and really enjoy the control I do have and give up that illusion of control over anything else in my life.  In fact, I no longer want to have control over those things I really never had control over, way too much work.  I choose to enjoy the freedom that comes with letting go.  I choose to live my life to the fullest, in this moment.  I wish you the same!


I love the words, Heart Felt, it means feeling deeply.  My heart felt desire is that we can all feel what is in our hearts all of the time.

To know what you are feeling at any given moment and really feel it.

I have many clients who have a heart felt longing to know who they are and what it is they are here to do.  We are given longing or desire to know, as a means to move us forward.

People are waking up in droves right now and they are all seeking to find what they are meant to do what is in their hearts.

I think we are meant to find ourselves and the truth of who we are, the truth that we are all one, that we are all spirit experiencing the subtle and not so subtle nuances that life has to offer, to revel, to rejoice, to wallow, to celebrate, to cry, to really experience every moment to their depths.  Once we have done that we can come from choice and decide if that felt good and if we want to do more of it.  If not, make the choice to see if from a different perspective and rise above it, make the choice to not react to it, to not do it again, not give it power.

Be that master of your life and celebrate you in it.  Come from your heart. Be the joy or not… it has always been your choice!


Today as I was working, I received a call from an dear friend of the family.  She was a close friend to my grandmother.  Hearing her voice and the sadness that still lingers there for the loss of my grandmother (it has been 3 years) but for this lovely women it as if it were yesterday, I realized that for her time has stopped.  It made me think about how precious our time is with people we love and know.  How our time here in this lifetime really is just a flash in the cosmic time.  I want to make change, make a difference, to effect global reawakening, and yet…..Am I really taking the moments with people that I meet on the street, at my door, in my daily life, in my business or even my close personal friends and family, am I taking the time I need to get to know who they are, what makes them live in the reality they do?  Am I taking the time to discover the precious moments the precious gifts that they have to offer me and am I offering them my gifts.  Am I helping to raise them up to the light?

All of these precious moments are the little joys that truly give our life meaning.

Find some joy today!

Light it up!


Are you thinking your thoughts or Are your thoughts thinking you?  A question you may want to be asking yourself any time that little pesky voice rears up and starts telling the truth, as it sees it, not the Truth you know.

Taking stock of your thoughts is a good way to know what is going on in your life; are you thinking..I do not have enough time,  I am always late, I am too fat,  too thin, too.. too…too!  Here is a good one, I do not know what I want or I am so stupid!  Listen to the words you say (or the voice says) to yourself.  They are very telling.

Are you fed up with giving your attention to the little voice?  Are you ready to take back control of your thoughts and take back control of your life?

Be the MASTER of your own Universe, start with your thoughts.

Have a positivity day.


This time of year my mind always wonders to those wonderful family times, to sharing good food and feeling safe and loved.  Looking back on those memories and how simple life seemed I find myself longing for that feeling again.  That innocence of times long ago………. OK so that was nice but I live NOW, here in this time and I want to make this time FEEL as wonderful as that felt them without trying to live in the past.
That is the challenge to bring the feelings forward to the NOW time without getting lost in the THEN time.  Recently I decided to see what it was like to live in the moment.  I have heard it my whole life but it never seemed possible or real. After all we live in a world that expects us to be certain places at certain times and if we aren’t people get mad.  WE are expected at any given moment to remember any number of facts to the point that we are filling our minds with all sorts of pasts and futures all at once and how do we STOP and live in this moment?

I am here to tell you it is possible!  I did not say it was easy but it is possible.
I did have to adjust my idea about it was slightly to function in the 21st century but here it is…….

Keep a really good schedule!!  I mean it; living in the now requires organization. No jumping in and saying “I am just going to live in the NOW right now and forever” Won’t work!  Buddha lived in simpler times and the amount of information that he needed to keep in his brain was just a fraction of the information we keep in our brains.  Times were different then.  So, keep yourself organized!

I decided one day that I was tired of living everywhere but where I was and I did just stop and decide to live in the moment.  I found that it had its down side. After all when you have your own business and you tell a client, in the moment, “Sure I will email that to you as soon as we are done” well when you are done, that moment has passed and you have forgotten all about emailing anything.  You are blissfully living in the moment and out of left field your client calls and says “Hey, YOU SAID……….” People just do not understand that you are living in the moment and the moment passes and it just did not get done!
So here is what I did, I got a very detailed schedule and a large stack of sticky notes!  Sticky notes are the best invention for the “moment livers” of the world.  We can be in the moment and write ourselves a note and forget about it until the scheduled time of note reading, Brilliant!!!  I have a very detailed schedule and I write in my appointments and note reading times each day and after I do I forget about them until the time that they arrive.  Well, that is not entirely honest, I look at my schedule just before I go to bed at night so I know if I have to get up early and moving or not.  I have missed appointments.

So with a little planning and accurate scheduling and very good note taking, YOU TOO, can be one of the lucky few who have mastered the art of LIVING IN THE MOMENT!

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