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Life is all about Change and just as the seasons change we change too.

Change is inevitable and if we fight it life is hard.  When we move with it, in the flow of it life is easy.

Learning to flow with life is the challenge most of us humans have.  If you watch nature most things just flow, no resistance and when there is resistance there is catastrophe!  Earthquakes are an example of resistance in the natural world.  We too often have life give us examples of our own catastrophic results of our resistance to change; Heart attacks, diabetes, cancer, depression all of these are our bodies way of saying “things are not alright with me!”.

So how do we avoid the catastrophes or repair the damage after a catastrophe?  Well, it requires us to change what is not working.  I know I can here you saying, “I do not even know what to change” or “It is uncomfortable”. Have you ever heard the saying “Anything worth having takes work?” It’s true, but I am here to tell you “YOU” are worth the work, discomfort and challenge.

Let’s break it down as to why change is so difficult; did you know that your Mind would rather be comfortable than change the status quo?  That’s right, your mind is so powerful that it is getting in the way of you making the changes necessary for better health, more happiness and total wellness.  As a matter of fact your mind is the thing that is controlling your every action, your Sub-conscious mind.  It is kind of like having an entity that lives in your head at a control panel that decides everything that you are going to do, say or be.  I don’t know about you but that thought is scary!  In essence your sub-conscious, that part that lives beneath the surface that you are not consciously aware of has ultimate power over your every thought and action.  Here is the other problem; your mind has been making decisions about everything that has ever happened to you from the moment you were born and possibly before that too.  The limiting decisions are the ones that are getting in the way.  It is like having filters that block you from even seeing the good that is all around you.  Say you had an experience where you were on the school grounds and some bully came up and took your lunch away from you and you were really hungry!  Your mind could have made a decision that said “My food will be taken away from me so I need to eat it fast”. The results would be that you would have difficulty letting food go and you would eat really fast which would make you eat more of it.  Or, your mind could have made the decision that “I can’t get what I want or need”. Well, then you could have the experience of never feeling like you deserve to have anything money, a partner, the right job no matter how hard you try.  Now neither of these scenarios would be conscious, it would be an underlying program that your mind keeps running so that it can feel in control.  Here is the other thing about the mind, it would rather be right than happy.  Wow, that’s a kicker.

What I am getting at here is that I know change is hard.  But it is not because you are lazy or have no will power.  It is because you have been looking in the wrong place to fix the problem.  It is not about you beating you up because you can’t, it is about you honoring you in the process of the change and waking up to the truth of what is really going on!

Change is a Really Good Thing, it means we are flowing with life and not against it.  just remember to love yourself along the way.


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Change is inevitable.  We all know it and yet most of us fear change.  We fear walking into the unknown, the un-discovered and it is because we do not know if we will be safe or not.  It all comes down to safety.  We are so afraid of change that we would rather stay with the uncomfortable, the un-fulfilling, the un-satisfying than face change.  I know people that stay in horribly abusive situation because they are afraid that what ever situation that follows will be worse than the one they are in.  They become numb.  This, to some degree or another, is how most people live their lives.  Sad, I know, but fact.  We would rather become numb to our existence  than change it.

Even when we have someone telling us that we can have a better life if we only…Give up the job, leave the partner or move.  We are so accustomed to our existence and numbness that we can not see beyond our current reality.  So we are in fear about what might come next.  The reason this happens is that it touches us in our very survival and when that happens we go into our fight or flight mechenism and we hunker down.  We will fight anyone or anything that threatens our reality.  We may not want to consciously stay in the bad marriage, partnership, job, town, whatever it is but at least we know what to expect.

So what happens when we finally get beyond the fear and do decide to make the change?  We have mustered up our courage and we take that leap of faith and……. there we are.  Things are always more interesting, scary, exhilarating.  This is the point where we find out what we are made of.  Many people get to this point, they have finally taken a step in the right direction and suddenly something comes along that triggers their fear and they jump back into the old pattern.  Or,. something comes along and they feel fear but they still decide to continue on the new path.  These are the few that dare to live grander, bigger and more adventurous lives.  They have faced themselves and their fear and still, they moved forward.

Does this mean that they will never face fear again, No!  They will probably face fear every day; it is just the way of things.  What will be different is that they know that they will survive.   This is the journey of life, we either grow and learn to face fear and change or we stand still.  I for one choose to face my fears head on every day because that means that I am growing and really, what’s the point of living if we are not growing?  I figure why waste the trip!

Learn to embrace change and take advantage of every opportunity to face yourself in truth.  Move forward knowing that you have lived, really lived!

I invite you to change something everyday, you might just like it!

If you would like to move forward in your life and  embrace change or would like to develop tools and skills to do that…I teach courses, classes and workshops to support you in you journey.  Go to http://www.in-lighten.net

In Light, Lorayne


All this month I have been talking about living an empowered life.  Well, what does that mean, really? Before I can answer that let’s look at what Power is, personal power, the power that is innately ours.  I do not mean power-over.  I mean that power that we hold within ourselves that defines us.

We have all had times or moments in our lives where we did not feel powerful, or that we had any power at all.  In fact we have felt small and insignificant.  How could we feel our power. Those times where we felt that we had no power were times when we gave our power to another.  Not consciously of course, but all the same we gave it to them.

Let me explain;  let’s say I have had an upbringing that modeled to me that men have all of the power and I am just a woman so I have no power.  As a child I knew no other way to operate.  I grew up and I am still playing out that same role because I am running on an old program.  As an adult I see examples out in the world that show me that men do not have all of the power,  consciously I know the old program is false.  I make attempts to stand up in my power and things are going along pretty well until I am challenged.  I am put in a position with a man who believes that woman do not have any right to power and all of the sudden my old programming is triggered, on the subconscious, and I hand this man all of my power and become subservient to his will.  This would throw me in to rage at myself because on some level I know I handed my power over.

Do you see how this mechanism gets triggered? and then we get whiny and angry and bitchy because we feel powerless!

So, how do we break out of our own programming and start to take back our power to become empowered?  We start to become aware of our actions when we are doing them.  We take classes, courses and workshops that help move us out of our old programming.  We rise up and say to ourselves NO-MORE!  This is truly an inside job.

I have a course called “Shift Your Perspective NOW!”  that helps you to start and recognize where you give your power away and helps you to identify your true power.  Check out my website at http://www.in-lighten.net.

It is my goal to see all women, men and children Empowered, so that they can live rich and full lives free from all programming from their past.

Imagine a world where everyone is intentful of purpose and free to choose their thoughts without any baggage from the past.  Image a world where we are all EMPOWERED!

Lorayne Ham,  In Lighten – Healing People MIND, BODY and SPIRIT


Today on the radio show, 1150AM, KKNW 8-9AM 1st Monday of the month, I took callers for the first on the show.  It was wonderful to hear from viewers who really want to embrace their independence of the outside influences in their lives.

I understand that it is not easy to shut the outside out, it is constantly in our faces screaming for our attention, it takes diligence to keep yourself on your track and not on everyone else’s.

What works for me is to;

Shut off the news or even TV all together.

Read books take inspire and uplift you.

If you have friends that are constantly trying to bring you down, maybe it is time to find new friends!

Let family members that do not believe your way have their thoughts and you keep yours.

Let family members know that you are no listening to the news or the doom and gloom and ask them to keep any negativity to themselves

Make choices that support you and uplift you. In every moment.

Be willing to make changes that are uncomfortable but in  the long run are beneficial.

Start with this moment right NOW.  Make a choice.

You are probably saying “easy for you”  but I too had to stat somewhere, I have just been doing this longer.  This is not easy work but it is the most important work you will ever do on your own behalf.  How important do you think you are in your life, if not you then who?  If you do not put you first in your life no one else will!  Take a stand, make a choice, live in passion for YOU!  You are worth the effort and your life is worth the effort, be willing to live a life of magic.

Be the role model for your children, your community, your country and the world.  The more of usthat are willing to shift our perspectives and live lives of our own choosing, the more we gicve others permission to do the same.

Take the challenge and live your Truth!

Experiment and have fun.


This month I have been talking about Joy, how Joy shows up in your life.  How are you using Joy to move you out of pain, frustration and sadness? Let’s look at ways you have shared with me the simple ways you have played with JOY.

Rena in Bothell, WA  “I have been struggling with changes in my family.  My father was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer and I have been finding it difficult to feel happy or joy, all I feel is sad. This news is not what we expected.  My mother is having a particularly difficult time.  I heard you on the radio talking about joy and decided to give it a try.  I wanted to feel joy bubbling up inside of me, it took me a while, I really wanted to feel better and change how I was looking at the situation.  After a minute or two of focusing on times in my family when we were all together and happy, I really did feel better.  I am going to get my family talking about the good times and see if that does not help.  Thank you.”

Rena, I know what you are going through, my mother was recently diagnosed with uterine cancer and when I heard the news I felt like I had been kicked in the stomach.
I recently sat with my mother during her recovery from surgery and looked through old photographs of times when both my mother and I were children it was really fun to take that walk down memory lane.  I know that I always say live in the now, but sometimes it is valuable to remember those really happy times so that you can remember the feelings. Taking that walk down memory lane was a very special time and one that I know lifted our spirits.

Karen in Seattle “I was recently laid off from work and this is a scary time.  I have three children and all of us have become accustomed to living on two incomes.  It is really hard to feel joy when everything around me says it is all falling apart.”

Karen, I hear what you are saying and I tell you, this is the most important time to feel joy!  Have you ever heard the statement “What you focus on you get?”  Well it is true, I know many of us have had times when we are really sad or upset or scared, everything around us seems to be falling apart and then it just keeps on snowballing.  So, how do you feel joy in the midst of chaos?  Change your focus, look at what you do have, a healthy family, a loving husband, beautiful things to surround you, friends.  The trick is to focus on what you are grateful for, the more you focus on gratitude the more you will move out of fear and into joy!

Sometimes we are given challenges in life to help us focus on what is really important, the simple joys of being with those you love and sharing a smile, a cup of tea and remembering the love.

The joys in life are most often those simple little unexpected moments when you can let the worries of the day wash off of you and be present in your life.

Let us all allow space for more joy in our lives!


I have been thinking lately that there are a lot of us that for some reason or other, hold back, relinquish our power and literally hand it over to others.

Now I do not mean that we consciously say “Hey, take my power, make me feel small and insignificant” I mean that out of our beliefs that we have about ourselves and our right to choose, we hold back, make no choice (which by the not doing, is a choice), sit and let others tell us what we should or should not do.

When is it enough?  When things come to the for-front of your mind, that is the time.  That is when you have the ability to choose. To no longer be controlled by the unseen voices that say “you are not good enough, who do you think you are, what right do you have” YOU have every right.  This is your life, not another single person on this planet of 6 billion people is uniquely you.  YOU are the only one that has your gifts, talents or viewpoint that maybe, just maybe is exactly what the planet needs right now.

When you have the conscious awareness that “this is not who I am” That is your que to really stop and take stock of how you are living your life.

So, I ask you, when is it your time to show up in your life and play your game?  When is it your time to grow up and be all that your heart wants you to be? When will you put you first and make time for YOU to discover YOU in a whole new way?  When will you create the life You were always meant to LIVE?

Check out my courses and workshops that facilitate you discovering YOU!  http://www.in-lighten.net


Many of us focus on the end results of our life and not on what is happening right now in this moment,  I wondered what it was that kept us focusing on the future with little or no thought or focus on today.  Really, you do not know what the future holds for you and even if you did you would have no control over it anyway.  The only thing you have control over is you in this moment, so why waste the opportunity?  Being a control freak myself, I like to have control or at least the illusion of control, so if I know that right now in this moment I can truly have control over my life, then I say let me at it!  I have control over what I think, what I say, how I feel and what I do about it, What Power, I am giddy with it.  Right now in this moment I choose to live my life to the fullest and really enjoy the control I do have and give up that illusion of control over anything else in my life.  In fact, I no longer want to have control over those things I really never had control over, way too much work.  I choose to enjoy the freedom that comes with letting go.  I choose to live my life to the fullest, in this moment.  I wish you the same!


I love the words, Heart Felt, it means feeling deeply.  My heart felt desire is that we can all feel what is in our hearts all of the time.

To know what you are feeling at any given moment and really feel it.

I have many clients who have a heart felt longing to know who they are and what it is they are here to do.  We are given longing or desire to know, as a means to move us forward.

People are waking up in droves right now and they are all seeking to find what they are meant to do what is in their hearts.

I think we are meant to find ourselves and the truth of who we are, the truth that we are all one, that we are all spirit experiencing the subtle and not so subtle nuances that life has to offer, to revel, to rejoice, to wallow, to celebrate, to cry, to really experience every moment to their depths.  Once we have done that we can come from choice and decide if that felt good and if we want to do more of it.  If not, make the choice to see if from a different perspective and rise above it, make the choice to not react to it, to not do it again, not give it power.

Be that master of your life and celebrate you in it.  Come from your heart. Be the joy or not… it has always been your choice!


Today as I was working, I received a call from an dear friend of the family.  She was a close friend to my grandmother.  Hearing her voice and the sadness that still lingers there for the loss of my grandmother (it has been 3 years) but for this lovely women it as if it were yesterday, I realized that for her time has stopped.  It made me think about how precious our time is with people we love and know.  How our time here in this lifetime really is just a flash in the cosmic time.  I want to make change, make a difference, to effect global reawakening, and yet…..Am I really taking the moments with people that I meet on the street, at my door, in my daily life, in my business or even my close personal friends and family, am I taking the time I need to get to know who they are, what makes them live in the reality they do?  Am I taking the time to discover the precious moments the precious gifts that they have to offer me and am I offering them my gifts.  Am I helping to raise them up to the light?

All of these precious moments are the little joys that truly give our life meaning.

Find some joy today!

Light it up!


Are you thinking your thoughts or Are your thoughts thinking you?  A question you may want to be asking yourself any time that little pesky voice rears up and starts telling the truth, as it sees it, not the Truth you know.

Taking stock of your thoughts is a good way to know what is going on in your life; are you thinking..I do not have enough time,  I am always late, I am too fat,  too thin, too.. too…too!  Here is a good one, I do not know what I want or I am so stupid!  Listen to the words you say (or the voice says) to yourself.  They are very telling.

Are you fed up with giving your attention to the little voice?  Are you ready to take back control of your thoughts and take back control of your life?

Be the MASTER of your own Universe, start with your thoughts.

Have a positivity day.

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